Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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