It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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