Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
