I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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