Do you still have your period?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
