She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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