...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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