it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize