They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
