Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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