i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
vagina is talking i cant
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize