I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
