she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize