He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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