HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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