It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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