did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
