It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
well you can't waste a boner
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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