just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
