your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
