Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
