I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
