Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
