last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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