Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
