I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
