i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
