why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
