your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize