I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
