When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize