Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
