pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
