Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
love makes seman taste better
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
