Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Sorry about my life...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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