She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
