I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
