I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
