He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
