I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I need to calm my uterus...
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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