ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
