Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
