Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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