And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
