Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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