So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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