Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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