i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
