we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
