You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Found your dick twin last night
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
