i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
