make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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