I want to make a zoo with you.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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